ACES WILD.
The roses of Saint Valentine's Day have already withered, but for the few precious petals sandwiched between poetic lines written by besotted lovers.
February has made a tiptoed entrance, and with a few hints of snow, just as quietly, waves a wistful goodbye.
WAS IT NOT JUST NEW YEAR'S EVE ?
Have the earnest resolutions not been broken, despite their good intentions ?
Time, like a rocket, is flying, exceeding our lethargic imagination. It is a challenge to keep abreast of the accelerating pace of changes, news and occurrences, which shower our consciousness like a persistent rain.
Covid-19 continues to haunt our awareness as the mortality toll scales the statistical heights no one had dared imagine.
Hope wrestles with science, while the vulnerable become unwitting collateral damage.
Then there is January 6th 2021.
This day will no doubt besmirch the history of the United States, as a most inglorious event.
What happened ?
What unleashed the rage and anger of so many predominantly middle-age and older men ?
When did this pent-up emotional stew begin to boil ?
What were the ingredients that cast this configuration of human beings into a mob of vengeful creatures, hell-bent on mayhem and destruction ?
Why are a group of seeming mature individuals transformed into a horde of screaming, vengeful, wild beasts, hungry for blood and destruction ?
The Covid-19 phenomenon has precipitated a cascade of events, not witnessed nor experienced for decades. The ramifications have impacted societal norms, health, healing modalities, family interactions, employment dynamics and the financial network, in various ways.
The usual and customary people interaction is constrained. Social distancing is now the norm, which highlights the emotional absence previously at play.
So the cards dealt for many to play,are a mixture of disease, unemployment, social confinement and its concomitant restrictions. The finite avenues available for social engagement, which could offset some of the stress and tensions related to this enforced lifestyle adjustment, are unavailable.
In a vain attempt to subdue the growing monster of discontent, many forms of distraction are engaged.
But distractions are incapable of healing the wounds which many adults bear as ACEs (Adverse Childhood Experiences), which are traumas of a wide variety, occurring in childhood.
As Dr. Van Der Kolk M.D. asserts in his book, ‘The Body Keeps The Score: Brain, Mind, Body in the Healing of Trauma’, long-standing effects result from these experiences.
It is significant that many of these symptoms of depression, broken relationships, chronic unpredictable toxic stress, present in the age group 30 to 60.
Maybe this factor of unresolved childhood trauma, mixed with the stress of the pandemic has been a bridge too far for many men.
Compounding the matter is an ACE which Jed Diamond Ph.D. addresses in his book ‘My Distant Dad: Healing the Family Father Wound’ highlighting the absence of validation, which most if not all men seek from their Fathers or facsimile thereof (mentor, elder or griot).
It might be a bold stretch, but one I am willing to make, which is that many of the insurrectionists had a deep desire to do the ‘Fathers’ will, and thereby gain validation.
‘TRUMP INVITED ME HERE’.
In some perverse and misguided manner, this gathering of discontented men, sought to perform a rite of passage.
By placating their Father Figure, the 45th President, they would convert the ACE of an absent father in their lives, to a winning hand of redemption and value.
What happened at the Capitol was almost prophesied by an elder and Medicine Man of the Dagara people in Burkino Faso, Malidoma Some Ph.D.;
“If you do not initiate your young men into the tribe, they will come back and burn down the village, just to feel the heat”.
For too long, many men have not heard what Robert Bly refers to as ‘the sound of male cells singing’.
I believe it is time for men to tell their stories.
It is time to play the ACES as a winning hand, and trump the sadness and despair to which many are currently tethered.
WOULD YOU AGREE ?
ENCOURAGE THE MEN YOU KNOW, TO TELL THEIR STORIES.
GENERATIONS CAN BENEFIT.
WOULD YOU LIKE TO KNOW YOUR ACE SCORE AND MORE ?
CONTACT US
https://www.mendoula.org/contact-us
EMAIL
rico@mendoula.org
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